Although Head Hopping sounds as if it could be some kind of children’s game, in writing, it’s a problem many newbie authors aren’t even aware of—despite being a logical mistake. After all, as he is creating his characters, he is all of them, in all their heads, feeling for all of them. He may balk at trying to keep in just one character’s view, because he then runs into the difficulty of letting the Reader know what the bad guy is planning—without letting the MC know. Some editors are rather touchy about POV slips, and some even judge it to be an amateurish mistake, so many stories come back from critique all marked up: Head Hopping. Once you’ve become serious about writing, you’ll probably discover that, other than Show Don’t Tell, you hear mentions of Head Hopping often…and wonder what it is.
Well, Head Hopping is related to Point of View—the perspective of the character through whose eyes and ears we experience the story. If the story suddenly switches from one character’s viewpoint to another, it disrupts the flow of the story…confusing readers, making them stop to figure out where they are. That means we need to understand just what Point of View is.
What is POV?
We have a post dedicated to POV, so here we are just going to hit the high points. First Person—in the head of the MC. Second Person—in your own head. Third Person Limited—in no one’s head…just a Fly on the Wall. Whatever the fly sees, the reader sees…whatever the fly hears, the reader hears—only in that room, at that time—no internal thoughts or emotions at all, just faces scrunched up or tears running down cheeks.
Third Person Omniscient—in everyone’s head, but only from a distance. We lose the opportunity to know any of the characters up close. The Omniscient Narrator, far removed from the story, sees all, knows all, and can report on the thoughts and emotions of anyone, but we don’t get to hear those thoughts or feel those emotions from the characters themselves. This technique avoids head hopping by taking a bird’s eye view, removing the reader from the story, from the action, from the characters—not telling the story from any one character’s perspective, rather from the perspective of some unidentified, all-knowing, massive, floating entity who is not even involved in the story. In some stories that may work, but most readers want to be in the action (picturing themselves as the characters…you know, escapism).
So, Where’s The Problem?
Most of the levels of POV are safe from Head Hopping. The issue only pops up when we use Third Person Close. In that POV, we sit on a character’s shoulder…listening to his thoughts, feeling his emotions, seeing the world through his eyes. Now although that’s a fine and dandy way to pull a reader into a story, because you are actually in his head, you can’t be in anyone else’s. In most cases, that’s satisfactory. The only difficulty is when you have some information that the POV character doesn’t have or isn’t supposed to have. How do you get that information to the reader?… Or do you?
Sometimes a lack of information is a good thing. Suspense can keep the reader interested, and instead of giving everything away, you can let the Reader (and the MC) figure things out for themselves based on what has been revealed—a technique known as Sub Text. Just remember that bouncing around in multiple points of view can not only be confusing to the reader, but also kick them out of the story, reminding them that they are reading something…rather than being there. As with an Omniscient Narrator, the reader can’t be in the story, experiencing it first-hand. The head hopping prevents them from suspending their disbelief. Let your readers become part of your story—keep them happy. Keep the POV tight, and your readers will develop a strong, emotional connection to the character…unbroken by lazy writing—they’ll care about him and what happens to him.
Revealing Information
Sometimes, there are things happening out of the view of the POV character, but he needs to know about them. The quick and easy way to handle this situation is to have a Witness. Some other character can come running up and tell the MC all about what just happened down the street, around the corner, in the building. If the information isn’t urgent, then finding out later may work, via a news article or a message.
On the other hand, you may have some information that the MC isn’t supposed to know (such as what the bad guy is doing). The only way to reveal that info to the reader is by switching to a new POV…and that can be done only at a break—a section break, a chapter break, or a scene break (don’t forget to use *** to show a change in location, time, or POV).
Avoid Head Hopping
When you list out your scenes and their purpose, always include the POV character…the character who has the most to gain or lose in that scene. That will also allow you to see whether all your key characters are getting a turn at presenting the story. Then, just start the scene with their name and write on!